No Pain No Gain

My husband loves the expression “No pain, no gain.” I, myself, am not a fan. It can’t be true. For example, if you don’t go through the pain of exercising (no pain), you’ll probably gain weight (some gain). See, I’ve disproved it already. 

I don’t think I should have to suffer to improve. To explore this contention, I thought I’d check out some often used exercise options to try and prove my point. 

One very popular exercise choice is yoga. As part of my exercise regime, I included yoga once a week. After a few weeks of trying to unsuccessfully tangle myself up like a pretzel and experiencing some pain in the process, I came to the conclusion that having an official yoga mat would solve all my problems. It didn’t.  

I am unable to force my body into weird and unnatural positions. I have ways to greet the sun other than doing a sun salutation. I just say, “Good morning sun.” and move on from there. In fact, I have my own personal preferred poses. There’s the yes-she-can-stand-up-after-getting-out-of-bed pose, the stand-in-front-of-the-coffee maker-holding-a-mug pose, and the advanced, leaning-against-the-counter-eating-a-bowl-of-cereal pose. 

Since yoga didn't seem to be working for me, maybe something to strengthen my muscles was in order. Weight lifting; that's the ticket. By choosing the right weights this could easily fall into my “no pain” exercise category. After some time, with things going pretty well, I figured I’d kick it up a notch and buy some heavier weights. 

My plan was to go to the next weight up, but when I got to the store and saw how expensive the weights were I decided to go up two more pounds; more bang for my buck. The fact that I could barely carry the weights out of the store was the first clue that my thriftiness may have been a bad idea. I guess the first exercise with my new weights will be to bring them in from the car. 

Perhaps my muscles just aren’t in shape for all of the twisting and lifting. I’ve been eyeing this thing called a foam roller which should be just the thing for loosening and preparing my muscles for my no pain exercise program. If this plan goes well I can write a book; take this baby on the road. I’ll be famous.

All you have to do with this foam roller gizmo is roll around on it. Simple. As you roll on it, it massages your muscles, helping them become more flexible. This thing might get me into such good shape that I’ll quickly move into elite athlete status. It never hurts to dream. 

Following a helpful online instruction video I find that of course this thing massages your muscles. I know that because it hurts. It’s like getting a deep tissue massage from Helga the Strong and Mean.

Oh, all right, maybe there is no gain without pain. But I’m still not giving in. I will diligently continue my mission to disprove my husband’s point. Otherwise I’ll have to suffer from his being right yet again. Gain for him, pain for me.